Warning! The questions and answers presented represent a slightly snarky mood. It doesn’t present itself too often, but nonetheless, the snappy comments must have an appropriate home. It’s better here than spoken.

Q: Is this for a grade?

A:  Does it matter?

Q: Do you offer extra credit?

A: No, finish and turn in your work the first time, and you won’t have to worry about extra credit.

Q:  Do you work on the warm-up exercises during class time?

A: No, it’s homework.  Ask your student.  He should know what’s going on in class.

Q:  How old are you?

A: As old as my tongue and a little bit older than my teeth. Shall I translate? It’s none of your business.

Q: What happens if I (insert ridiculous hypothetical statement)?

A:  I don’t deal in hypothetical situations.  I deal in the real world.

Q: Can I call you by your first name?

A: Have you lost your mind?

Q: When is this due?

A: What do the directions say?

Q: I don’t get it.

A:  When you have a question, I will answer it.  Saying “I don’t get it” is a statement, not a question.

Q:  Are you part-(insert ethnic group)?

A: (Silent death stare)

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